"There are so many blacks inside this car!"
-Superman on the phone with his friend explaining what we have in our car (black car seats, black seats, black floors.... "black" children)

If everyday were as good as this one

I would die a happy woman

God always comes through

So here is a cheesed out post...

But I have to say that sometimes things just fall into place and there is no other explanation. We're really struggling to get our lawyers retainer fee together. We're just starting out in life and really have very little savings... Add to that our wedding in just 6 short weeks and we are completely drained. Well when we got our tax returns back a couple months ago something was weird with them. So I sent the paper back asking them to contact me, and tonight they did. We are getting back 3,000 more. Perfect timing. Thank you to that greater power who I know will always be watching over my family, no matter which way this case ends up.

Liquidating our assets

We've begun liquidating our assets.

The first stop was the mall. Yes thats where I began. I stood in line at The Children's Place with bag of clothes and 60 day old receipt in hand. 20 minutes later I emerged with +$40 for the lawyer fund.

Next stop Charles Schwab. (Where I should make out a tad bit better)

Wednesdays are so not my day

Let me recount the following 3 Wednesdays for you

1) Biomom calls me and tells me shes moving the next day
2) We find the Bean's Biodad
3) We locate a good lawyer (and the quake felt round the world is me hitting the floor when I find out the initial retainer fee)

So now for week number 4. Bean's dad plans on getting custody. The adoption worker called to inform me of this today. However conveniently he has been arrested (she was visiting him in jail). He is awaiting something (sentencing? trial? who knows). Of course I went into sleuth mode and tried to find out what he was in for, the jail would only tell me his bail was 40,000... which makes me think its not anything major.

He will find out how long hes in the pokey sometime in August. Should he get a longer sentence he'll probably be out of the running for getting custody of Bean. However knowing my luck he will only get probation and this news will be delivered on a Wednesday.

Of course if he doesnt get custody he wants his mother to get custody, and if she cant get custody he will surrender to Aunt T. No of course he will not surrender to us. Because this case isnt complicated enough yet.

Met an awesome lawyer!

And we're really excited about this one! She was really experienced and we're looking forward to working with her...

The major shocker is of course the retainer fee...

Part of me just wants to straight out write the amount down...

But the other part knows its tacky to discuss your financial situation with others.

I will say this:

It is more than the kids yearly stipend.

It is less than our apartments yearly rent.

It is more than our wedding.

It is less than our yearly college loan payment.

It is more than our car is worth

But most importantly, it is less than they are worth... because of course they are priceless. And I would give every penny I have and every penny I will ever earn in my life to increase our chances of making them ours forever.

Don't let him see you cry

Superman drew this for me tonight. He said "Mommy I have a good idea! If Aunt T tries to steal me you can follow the van to her house and steal me back!" I think he thought the van thing because the DYFS workers usually drive minivans when they transport the kids to visits. He said "You have to follow the van so you can steal me back". The people outside of the car are from left to right aunt T, Bean, BioMom, Superman. He said that Aunt T and BioMom would be so happy, but that he would be so sad which is why the drawings of him and Bean are crying. He also drew the sun crying and said "Even the sun would be sad if they took me away" When I asked him why he drew himself bigger he said "I wish I was bigger so I could fight back"

After he went to bed I was taking this picture of the drawing and Superman came out of his bedroom to use the bathroom. When he saw me looking at the picture he said "Im so happy your studying so you can find me"